Featurettes about the Catholic Church
1) "mary remained a virgin, and...."
"but it says in the bible that Jesus had brothers and sisters, and one of them named James is a historical figure, same with Joses, Judas, Simon and his sisters too..."
"SILENCE!"
2)"hey, let's all pray to saints!"
"um, why?"
"because we ourselves do not deserve to pray to God, so they can pray for us"
"where does it say that in the bible? and, i mean, the whole point of the christian faith is a personal relationship with God..."
"SILENCE!"
(Jack says:
LOL)
3) "hey, let's get a ruler dude... let's call him a pope, and he will be the decsendant of saint peter and he'll be the voice of God on earth!"
"hey yeah great idea!"
"hey dudes, what year is it?"
"year 900... why?"
"well, if we're supposed to choose a direct descendant of saint Peter, thats gonna be kinda hard, because his lineage ended like, 20 years after him? i don't even know if he had a kid... and doesn't god annoint people himself to his voice on earth? and why are chrsitians gonna be under the dominion of one church leader that doesn't even have a biblical foot to stand on to have any legitimacy?"
"SILENCE!"
Patty // www.tejic.se says:
"hey guys, lets say that the bread and wine of the lords supper is ACTUALLY the blood and body of christ, so that people think it's more than a symbol..."
"hey yeah, great idea"
"but dudes, doesn't that mean thet Jesus hasn't died once and only once for our sins? that means he is sacrificed every single time for our sins when we have the lords supper... thats not really biblical.. i mean, Jesus didn't cut off his arm at the lords supper, he said the things figuratively and..."
"SILENCE!"
4) "Hey, i know, i think that the priest dude, he should be the one who receives confessions from the people"
"yeah!"
"and he should be the one saying what they need to do to such and such thing to be forgiven, like i dunno... let's call it a hail mary and other stuff like that...."
"yeah, i like that"
"yeah, and let's also have things that you have to buy for forgiveness... called indulgences-
"catchy!
"- thank you,.... yeah indulgences. that way, we get a bunch of money and people feel compelled to buy them because they want to go to heaven..."
" but hey, dudes... it says in the Bible that the only person who can forgive sins is God himself... and that you are justified by faith, not by actions, so the whole hail mary stuff is just bunk...and i mean, how corrupt is it to have people buy their salvation? that isn't anywhere in the Bible and it's perverted in a way, and-..."
"SILENCE!"
"-hey is this why we're not actually allowed to have Bibles and...-"
"SILENCE!!"
5) "Hey guys, i have an idea..."
"yeah?"
"yeah, so picture this: we keep people guessing about them or their loved ones going to heaven after all... so we invent a thing called purgatory, where people go if they either weren't baptised, or something like that..."
"i like i like... hey, maybe we could have people like, buy candles and stuff, that they wold light as a prayer, you know... and sellt he candles, so we get filthy rich..."
"hey yeah, that would be sweeeeeet. and people would never know if they are actually going to heaven or not, so they would need us for everything and believe everything we say!"
"yeah!!"
"hey guys, sup?"
"oh nothing nothing...-"
"nah, we're talking about a thing called purgatory, where people go if we feel like it and then we get moolah when poeple buy candles and stuff to get people out of purgatory... you know...and then people are at our mercy, it's so sweet."
"hey dudes... that isn't anywhere in the Bible... it says that you have either accpeted the Lord Jesus-Christ as your savior and you go to heaven, or you haven't and you go to hell... i mean, thats pretty black and white... and like, whats up with the selling of candles? thats like corrupt, you know... why do you want money? "burglars and moths will eat away at these earthly things..." and i mean, yeah, what up with the whole "controlling people" thing, thats like messed up... i mean, i don't think God would be very pleased with you-"
"SILENCE!"
"- hey so is this another reaosn why no one gets a Bible to read on their o-"
"SILENCE!!!"
"but it says in the bible that Jesus had brothers and sisters, and one of them named James is a historical figure, same with Joses, Judas, Simon and his sisters too..."
"SILENCE!"
2)"hey, let's all pray to saints!"
"um, why?"
"because we ourselves do not deserve to pray to God, so they can pray for us"
"where does it say that in the bible? and, i mean, the whole point of the christian faith is a personal relationship with God..."
"SILENCE!"
(Jack says:
LOL)
3) "hey, let's get a ruler dude... let's call him a pope, and he will be the decsendant of saint peter and he'll be the voice of God on earth!"
"hey yeah great idea!"
"hey dudes, what year is it?"
"year 900... why?"
"well, if we're supposed to choose a direct descendant of saint Peter, thats gonna be kinda hard, because his lineage ended like, 20 years after him? i don't even know if he had a kid... and doesn't god annoint people himself to his voice on earth? and why are chrsitians gonna be under the dominion of one church leader that doesn't even have a biblical foot to stand on to have any legitimacy?"
"SILENCE!"
Patty // www.tejic.se says:
"hey guys, lets say that the bread and wine of the lords supper is ACTUALLY the blood and body of christ, so that people think it's more than a symbol..."
"hey yeah, great idea"
"but dudes, doesn't that mean thet Jesus hasn't died once and only once for our sins? that means he is sacrificed every single time for our sins when we have the lords supper... thats not really biblical.. i mean, Jesus didn't cut off his arm at the lords supper, he said the things figuratively and..."
"SILENCE!"
4) "Hey, i know, i think that the priest dude, he should be the one who receives confessions from the people"
"yeah!"
"and he should be the one saying what they need to do to such and such thing to be forgiven, like i dunno... let's call it a hail mary and other stuff like that...."
"yeah, i like that"
"yeah, and let's also have things that you have to buy for forgiveness... called indulgences-
"catchy!
"- thank you,.... yeah indulgences. that way, we get a bunch of money and people feel compelled to buy them because they want to go to heaven..."
" but hey, dudes... it says in the Bible that the only person who can forgive sins is God himself... and that you are justified by faith, not by actions, so the whole hail mary stuff is just bunk...and i mean, how corrupt is it to have people buy their salvation? that isn't anywhere in the Bible and it's perverted in a way, and-..."
"SILENCE!"
"-hey is this why we're not actually allowed to have Bibles and...-"
"SILENCE!!"
5) "Hey guys, i have an idea..."
"yeah?"
"yeah, so picture this: we keep people guessing about them or their loved ones going to heaven after all... so we invent a thing called purgatory, where people go if they either weren't baptised, or something like that..."
"i like i like... hey, maybe we could have people like, buy candles and stuff, that they wold light as a prayer, you know... and sellt he candles, so we get filthy rich..."
"hey yeah, that would be sweeeeeet. and people would never know if they are actually going to heaven or not, so they would need us for everything and believe everything we say!"
"yeah!!"
"hey guys, sup?"
"oh nothing nothing...-"
"nah, we're talking about a thing called purgatory, where people go if we feel like it and then we get moolah when poeple buy candles and stuff to get people out of purgatory... you know...and then people are at our mercy, it's so sweet."
"hey dudes... that isn't anywhere in the Bible... it says that you have either accpeted the Lord Jesus-Christ as your savior and you go to heaven, or you haven't and you go to hell... i mean, thats pretty black and white... and like, whats up with the selling of candles? thats like corrupt, you know... why do you want money? "burglars and moths will eat away at these earthly things..." and i mean, yeah, what up with the whole "controlling people" thing, thats like messed up... i mean, i don't think God would be very pleased with you-"
"SILENCE!"
"- hey so is this another reaosn why no one gets a Bible to read on their o-"
"SILENCE!!!"
posted by Patty VonWebster at 8:45 PM
1 Comments:
It's all so clear! To follow Christ means just that - to follow Christ. He loves us enough to die for even me and wants to know me and that is very personal. Nothing else like it on this planet - amazing.
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