From the Mind of Patrick Quinn.
http://dailytelegraph.news.com.au/story/0,20281,18819508-5001028,00.html
Apparently they think they can beat us. Okay, lets recap whats been going on here in the international community.
Iran: We want nuclear capabilities!
US: No, you're not responsible enough and we don't rust you. You'll probably use them for weapons.
UK: I agree.
Germany: I'm indifferent.
France: We would have an opinion, accept we are am too busy with our own citizens rioting in the streets every two weeks. As a whole, I disagree with whatever the silly Americans say.
Russia: Can any of you spare me some change?
Canada: Eh!
Iran: We wouldn't use them for weapons. Our nuclear technology would only be used for energy purposes.
US: Why should we trust you?
Iran: Why does anyone trust you? You have the largest nuclear arsenal in the world!
US: Yeah, but our head of state hasn't called for the irradiation of a nation.
Iran: The nation of Zion is at it's dusk! The people of Israel will be wiped form the face of the earth!
Israel: Hey! Fuck you asshole!
Iran: Science! Your plights are factitious and you are nothing but a rouse to remove Palestinians from their rightful land!
Israel: Rightful land? We were there long before Islam even...
Iran: Bah! We will show you the fury of Al...hold on...uh...why is the USA in Iraq!
US: What does that have to do with you getting nuclear capabilities?
Iran: We would be more responsible than you. Look at yourselves! Thinking you are all badass, with your bling and your hoes, and bulling other countries. And you have nuclear weapons! Thats not fair!
UK: I thought you chaps didn't want nuclear weapons?
Iran: We...uh...we don't. Our studies of nuclear technology are for the benefit of our own people only.
Germany: I'm suspicious.
China: I am cautiously optimistic.
Russia: I'm hungry. Can somebody please spot me a few bucks? Hey Iran, I have lots of nuclear things I do not need. I give you some if you throw me some cash....pleeeeeeeez.
Iran: No thanks. We'd rather know how to make nukes from scratch.
Germany: Why do you need to know that?
Iran: We are a self sufficient nation! We don't need handouts from others!
US: Why does your army use Soviet tanks then?
Iran: Mind your own bees-wax!
UN: I believe Iran should put their testing on hold. First, we should go through a long, drawn-out, non-feasible, overall pointless, and bureaucratic analysis of the project first.
Iran: Hey! Who let you in. And what business do you have telling me what to do?
UN: Well, I am the United Nations after all. We strongly advise you to comply with us.
Iran: What if I don't.
UN: We'll sanction you.
Iran: Oh no! I can't buy cheap plastic from China, crappy Danish furniture, and American football jerseys. I'm shaking in my boots! Get lost.
UN: Well then, I'll shake my finger at you, you naughty person.
Canada: Eh!
Iran: Ah-Ha! To late! I have figured out how to make enriched uranium!
US: Goddamnit!
UK: I say!
Germany: O-9!
Russia: Rats. You didn't take my offer. You suck! I don't condone your actions.
Iran: Another triumph for Islam!
US: You're starting to piss me off.
Iran: Bring it bitch! You are a weak decaying power! Your feeble army will be crushed by the wrath of Allah! Israel is doomed! I COULD FIGHT YOU ALL WITH MY EYES CLOSED AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IRAN IS THE NEW SUPERPOWER OF THE WORLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ...but only if you attack me first. So there!
RIGHT ON!
Apparently they think they can beat us. Okay, lets recap whats been going on here in the international community.
Iran: We want nuclear capabilities!
US: No, you're not responsible enough and we don't rust you. You'll probably use them for weapons.
UK: I agree.
Germany: I'm indifferent.
France: We would have an opinion, accept we are am too busy with our own citizens rioting in the streets every two weeks. As a whole, I disagree with whatever the silly Americans say.
Russia: Can any of you spare me some change?
Canada: Eh!
Iran: We wouldn't use them for weapons. Our nuclear technology would only be used for energy purposes.
US: Why should we trust you?
Iran: Why does anyone trust you? You have the largest nuclear arsenal in the world!
US: Yeah, but our head of state hasn't called for the irradiation of a nation.
Iran: The nation of Zion is at it's dusk! The people of Israel will be wiped form the face of the earth!
Israel: Hey! Fuck you asshole!
Iran: Science! Your plights are factitious and you are nothing but a rouse to remove Palestinians from their rightful land!
Israel: Rightful land? We were there long before Islam even...
Iran: Bah! We will show you the fury of Al...hold on...uh...why is the USA in Iraq!
US: What does that have to do with you getting nuclear capabilities?
Iran: We would be more responsible than you. Look at yourselves! Thinking you are all badass, with your bling and your hoes, and bulling other countries. And you have nuclear weapons! Thats not fair!
UK: I thought you chaps didn't want nuclear weapons?
Iran: We...uh...we don't. Our studies of nuclear technology are for the benefit of our own people only.
Germany: I'm suspicious.
China: I am cautiously optimistic.
Russia: I'm hungry. Can somebody please spot me a few bucks? Hey Iran, I have lots of nuclear things I do not need. I give you some if you throw me some cash....pleeeeeeeez.
Iran: No thanks. We'd rather know how to make nukes from scratch.
Germany: Why do you need to know that?
Iran: We are a self sufficient nation! We don't need handouts from others!
US: Why does your army use Soviet tanks then?
Iran: Mind your own bees-wax!
UN: I believe Iran should put their testing on hold. First, we should go through a long, drawn-out, non-feasible, overall pointless, and bureaucratic analysis of the project first.
Iran: Hey! Who let you in. And what business do you have telling me what to do?
UN: Well, I am the United Nations after all. We strongly advise you to comply with us.
Iran: What if I don't.
UN: We'll sanction you.
Iran: Oh no! I can't buy cheap plastic from China, crappy Danish furniture, and American football jerseys. I'm shaking in my boots! Get lost.
UN: Well then, I'll shake my finger at you, you naughty person.
Canada: Eh!
Iran: Ah-Ha! To late! I have figured out how to make enriched uranium!
US: Goddamnit!
UK: I say!
Germany: O-9!
Russia: Rats. You didn't take my offer. You suck! I don't condone your actions.
Iran: Another triumph for Islam!
US: You're starting to piss me off.
Iran: Bring it bitch! You are a weak decaying power! Your feeble army will be crushed by the wrath of Allah! Israel is doomed! I COULD FIGHT YOU ALL WITH MY EYES CLOSED AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IRAN IS THE NEW SUPERPOWER OF THE WORLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ...but only if you attack me first. So there!
RIGHT ON!
posted by Patty VonWebster at 10:29 PM
1 Comments:
Yeah. Pretty spot-on. Is the world political status-quo ridiculous, or is it ridiculous? You know Bush has got 38% approval rating in the States. Plus, in eight years everyone will be learning Chinese in school.
I also read this comic book about Tchernobyl that made my skin crawl...
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